…because as a 23 year old reality TV watching MFA student, I am a part of the Gosselin family. I love celebrity gossip and tabloids. My #1 guilty pleasure is reading the National Enquirer. I love it. I want a subscription. Maybe next year.

I watched Jon & Kate Plus Eight from the very beginning of the show. I can almost easily identify each of the children. I’ve watched them poop all over themselves and go to Disney World. I love Alexis and her alligator and Aaden the little Professor. I think that Joel will grow up and realize he’s gay. Mady’s a whiner and a drama queen, but I guess she’s okay. I have to accept her, since I’m a part of that family.

And so I couldn’t wrap my head around the articles that began to appear in my beloved and mostly accurate National Enquirer. Jon couldn’t be doing all that partying! Jon wouldn’t be dating college girls!

I cried when I watched the episode where Jon and Kate made the announcement that they would be separating, just like I cried on the Girls Next Door episode when Kendra announces she’s leaving the Mansion. I couldn’t help it. This is a family I wanted to work. How can they be giving up??? Oh, and for the record, I’m on Team Kate. I can relate to her obsessive and organizational antics, and I think you have to maintain a level of control with eight children that is much different from normal 2.5 children households.

I don’t believe that the pressures of reality television brought the relationship to a screeching halt. I’ve thought from the beginning that there must be something more sinister at work. I was not alone in this belief, as you can see from the article at Conspiracy Corner: What if Jon and Kate were Faking— Everything?

I’ve said from the beginning that if a separation/divorce would bring the highest ratings that Jon & Kate Plus Eight ever experienced, a reunion would bring even HIGHER ratings. Look at the channel. TLC is all about lovey dovey crap, from a Baby Story to What Not to Wear. This is a channel that makes us believe we’re all beautiful and everything works out… most of the time. So when I saw this article today (Gosselin Apologizes, Tries to Halt Divorce, but a New Kate Plus Eight Moves On), I felt a glimmer of hope. Could they reunite? Could this all work out? Is it possible that Jon’s midlife crisis is over? Has the evil marketing plan decided to make its last move towards a dramatic family reunion full of kisses and balloons? We all love a happy ending.